Andy Fine: Can we get some outdoor seating? Where am I supposed to eat my Egg White Delight and Fruit ’N Yogurt Parfait?
Jeremy Owens: This house is in desperate need of special sauce.
Andy: The perimeter looks like a four-piece McNugget in a 20-piece box.
Andy: That’s a lot of brown.
Jeremy: I haven’t been this bored since season 5 of The Bachelorette.
Andy: The entrance is terrible. Where’s the limo supposed to pull up?
Jeremy: Jillian, girl, congrats — you dodged a bullet.
Jeremy: I hope Jabari has good insurance; those stair railings look rickety.
Andy: What do you call this style? Mary Poppins chic?
Jeremy: Any player who leaves the Bulls deserves to spend eternity in a haunted mansion. Mazel tov!
Andy: Is this the newest branch of the Chicago Public Library?
Jeremy: Wait, are we sure that’s not a prison?
Andy: This house is as cold as ice … hockey.
Jeremy: The Stanley Cup money couldn’t buy a yard?
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