There has been a wave of drive-by paintball gun shootings in Chicago recently, which to most has to sound like a joke headline but we promise that it’s not. It’s completely real. Basically what’s going on is this; assholes are driving around Chicago and picking off innocent bystanders on street corners, but instead of real guns they are using paintball guns.
Mind you this is Chicago, a city known for actual shootings of all varieties. There are actually people out here that think driving around with a gun, that shoots paint, is a wise idea.
The wave has hit various neighborhoods around the city but the most recent incidents have been focused on university campuses, with the most attacks being in the University of Chicago. U of Chicago, of course, being in the Hyde Park neighborhood on the South Side. But other incidents at the University of Illinois-Chicago and DePaul have been reported as well. Now, on one hand, people are not dying from this. However, this string of incidents has resulted in more than a handful of hospitalizations as victims are being hit in the facial area, causing eye injuries.
According to the Chicago Tribune, “At least eight people on or near university campuses in Chicago have suffered eye injuries from a string of paintball attacks.”
Chicago is already a city with a very serious gun violence issue that leaves pedestrians constantly on edge as they roam the streets of the city’s various neighborhoods. The peppering of paintballs is not going to do anything to assist in combating the actual issue at hand. Per data as recent as October 9th, there have been 605 gun-related deaths in Chicago. The city doesn’t need a few cars toting paintball guns like a couple of high school freshman at Challenge Park shooting up neighborhood blocks like Jackson Pollack. It’s completely unnecessary.
No lie, we tried to make this as satirical as possible, jabbing at the fact that paintball guns are still a thing and that people are using them but with each passing word we just grow more and more agitated that the gun violence issue will merely be perpetuated because of a childish act. Paint-balling in 2020 is about as neat as Jim Boylen is good at coaching.
Have you been a part of or bystander to one of these paintball attacks around the city? Reach out to us at firstname.lastname@example.org or drop a line in the comments and we’ll add your account to our on-going story of these incidents around Chicago.
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Featured Image Credit: DePaul University Facebook Page
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